Match Details: Armthorpe Welfare 10 [TEN] – Kinsley Boys 0 (FA Vase QR2)Goalscorers:
Joe Lumsden 21
Henry Sibenge 25
Adam Lee 38
Henry Sibenge 40 (pen)
Aaron Jones 56
Chris Davies 58
Adam Lee 65
Adam Lee 69
Adam Lee 81
Joe Lumsden 87
Pre-Match Build Up: Some people, when going to games as a neutral, like to invoke a bit of goal-whoring from time to time – i.e. the practice of picking a game which they think might be so one-sided they witness a glut of goals. Personally, I prefer to see summat which is likely to be more closely contested. So having seen Kinsley dispatch Maltby in the previous round (a team which sit just a couple of places below Armthorpe in the league), I was confidently predicting for them to give another good account of themselves today, and maybe even cause another upset – it’s perhaps just as well I’m not normally a betting man! As a nipper, I always used to get excited whenever the BBC videprinter had to add extra brackets during Final Score to ackowledge a result that was so big it looked more like a typing error. So today I was similarly chuffed to witness my first ever instance of a team scoring 10 [TEN] goals at this level of football. I can also conclude that accidental goal-whoring is far more satisfying than deliberate goal-whoring, as despite the astonishing scoreline, this was actually a highly competative game. Anyway, more about that later. First of all, set the controls for…
Competition: FA Vase, Second Qualifying Round
Also purchased: Pin badge £3 / Tea 60p
Weather: Dull and overcast (a bit shite for photos, but evidently ideal for goal scoring!).
Directions: Armthorpe is situated around 4 miles east of Doncaster city centre. As well as Armthorpe Welfare FC, the village is also home to Doncaster Knights Rugby Union Club, who play around half a mile away at the Castle Park complex. If you’re driving from Doncaster then you’ll pass the rugby ground on your right just as you enter Armthorpe. The football ground is quite easy to find (despite its lack of signposting), as it is situated in the alleyway between the two major local landmarks of Markham Main Social Club and Morrisions supermarket. Parking is quite limited at the ground, so be prepared to either use nearby sidestreets, or be very naughty and park in the supermarket car park. The nearest rail station is Doncaster, and from the adjoinging bus station at Doncaster Interchange, the numbers 81 and 82 both stop right outside the ground. During peak times, each service runs every 20 minutes, and as either will do, this means you’ve got a bus every 10 minutes from the bus station to the football ground. Journey time is around 15 minutes.
If you can have such a thing as an ‘omen in hindsight’, then surely the lack of Kinsley goalkeeper at the time I copied the teamsheet above was a pointer to the scoreline!
Off The Pitch: For a change here, I’ll do a ‘Reynards’s Hunting Grounds’-style walk round the pitch. On entering the main turnstile, you’re immediately in the right place for the tea room – always a good sign, design-wise! Adjoining this are the toilets and various offices / changing rooms, meaning that you have everything in one corner which gives the ground a well-set out feel to it. Turning right and going anti-clockwise round the ground, along the first side of the pitch you have a fairly long covered stand (pictured below), with wooden bench seating and a separate section for directors and visiting officials.
Beyond this stand is a small amount of hard-standing, and a bit of grass-style terracing behind it.
Then down the far end of the ground, is some three-step covered standing accomodation thus…
You’ll also notice that the club has some proper full size floodlights in the background as well. Not all the floodlights are of this same sort though – as the two at the opposite side are situated on top of some altogether different pylon thingamujigs.
Then down the opposite end behind the other goal is totally uncovered hard-standing. There is also another turnstile which is not normally in use, but looks as though it would still be functionable if needed.
This brings you back to the corner of the ground where you entered, with the tea hut / office cabins just out of shot to the left in the photo below. All in all, a nicely laid out ground then, and although a year or two back there were murmerings in the local paper about the club possibly looking to reloacte to a purpose-built ground near the M18 one day, the set up at Church Street seems perfectly fine for the time being.
On The Pitch: Seeing as I spend as much time taking photos at games as I do closely watching the match, I’m not even going to attempt to give a detailed run-down of what happened on the pitch in a ten goal thriller. Instead, I shall point you in the direction of Armthorpe’s own report on their website here:
My own summary of the game would be that despite the astonishing tally of goals which Armthorpe managed to amass by the end, in no way was this what you would call ‘a ten nil game’ to watch. Maybe a 4-1 or a 5-2, as Kinsley weren’t particularly bad, and indeed had a couple of decent chances of their own to register on the scoresheet. On another day at least one of these would have gone in, and after half an hour of the match, with Armthorpe 2-0 up you could easily see Kinsley getting back into the game still. The ten-nil was I would say a result of Armthorpe ultimately just being an extra yard quicker / fitter overall, combined with being ruthless in front of goal and benefitting from some good finishing, and teamwork which enabled them to often have an extra man spare in attack. Mind you, I also remember them missing two other excellent chances late in the second half, so it could easily have been even more than ten that was registered. But this equals the club’s record victory in modern times, and is their highest known home win (as the other was a 10-0 away win at Brodsworth Welfare). The pick of the goals was probably Aaron Jones’ dipping volley over the keeper on 56 minutes, which also really killed the game off as a contest. After that, you really have to give credit to the home side’s teamwork and organisation, which ultimately brought them a day to remember forever. As always though in football, you’re only as good as your last result, so Armthorpe’s next challenge will be to translate this performance into their league form, and hopefully work their way up the table as their current bottom half position is surely below what they are capable of. My thanks to Armthorpe for their hospitality, and I look forward to returning again soon for another similarly entertaining afternoon!
The closest Kinsley came to scoring was when Scott Collins (above) successfully rounded the goalkeeper, but saw his goalbound shot spectacularly headed away by the last Armthorpe defender
I did lose track near the end, but I think this is the tenth goal going in (or maybe number nine?)
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